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Wednesday, August 26, 2009

A few corrections at the office

Acid reflUx, not acid reflEx. My reflex right now? Punch you in the face.

It's scape goat, not escape goat. You blame it, not run away on it.

Nutrition vs attrition: Nutrition involves the nourishment we receive from our food. Attrition is when we don't backfill a position once someone is fired or resigns/retires/dies. If we're losing employees due to nutrition, we're going to see a big increase in our insurance premiums.

Thank you for your patients. Patience is what we want people to have when it takes awhile for us to fix their printer. Patients are what we want to have if we are employed as doctors.

Also, please be on the lookout for gruntled employees. And next time you screw up, you are going to be reprimanned. No, not reprimanded. Reprimanned.

My job may not always carry a heavy workload but I like to think my salary reflects a decent amount of hazard pay.

16 comments:

Yaya said...

Yup, I have the punch-you-in-the-face reflex brewing in my mind a lot too....

The Wife O Riley said...

Patients are what you have when you punch everyone in the face for running off the escapegoats.

C. Beth said...

Ha!!! I love all those eras they're making.

(I hope my misspelling makes sense; it's one I could imagine seeing in the south.)

Princess Andy said...

omg i hate stupid people.

it takes all of my will to not correct them with a "did you graduate high school?" look and a disgusted snort.

but i'm a judgmental bitch that way.

the one that gets me still is "usposed".

that was my ex-husbands way of pronouncing "supposed".

AAAGGGHHH!

andy

Drahdrah said...

Oh boy, I hope I haven't offended you with my bad gramar and speling. Now I'm envous !!!

Grand Pooba said...

Oh boy, stupid people are everywhere aren't they?

a corgi said...

LOL; because of my job, I catch things like this when I see them other places (but never on my blog, of course :)

I loved the gruntled employees for sure!

In reality, I have trouble with lose and loose a lot; I should remember it this way, I want to lose weight so my pants will be loose

enjoy the day

betty

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

I'm going to put in a note to HR to make sure that we have enough escape goats in the case of a fire.

sherri said...

Your write. Their our weigh to many mistakes hear. I don't blame you four wanting too punch people in the face!

Strange Mamma said...

My husband is writing a paper and a colleague (bit of a know-it-all) makes a mention of his spelling of 'travelling' with two l's being British (and Canadian and Australian but whatever) and perhaps we should go with the American spelling (since that's what he is). But this is how he says it:

"It's probably best to spell traveling with one 'l' as that's how its done around hear."

I kid you not. It was everything I could do to not get on a plane to Chicago and beat him with a large dictionary.

Leah Rubin said...

I'm loving it! Speaking as the original "word nerd", it is my mission in life to ferret out the misspellings, misuses and general errata found in everyday life! Perhaps we are related??

Moxie said...

My favorite is the ESCAPE GOAT!

I can imagine one of your co-workers hopping on a goat after they make a stupid verbal mistake like that.

Quilly said...

These are wonderful! I am a homonym Nazi -- except when I am making the mistakes.

I have been been interviewing for jobs, and yesterday while applying for an editorial position for a small local magazine, I saw a cover letter from one of my competitors. The young man had written, "I really look forward to working with you and hope you except me for the job."

I thought, gee, something tells me they will. LOL!

2cats said...

I seen your blog fore today. And had too comment.
Your rite of course, their are to many misteaks made.

cherie said...

haha, funny one! love this!

Tori_z said...

So many people make those types of mistakes. People don't like it when you correct them though. ;)