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Monday, September 14, 2009

What's in a Name?

I feel bad for certain names - through no fault of their own, they inspire cringing, nausea, and chills.

For example, Alice. As a child, Alice conjured up images of the beautiful blond-haired blue-eyed Disney darling of Wonderland. Until I met my Gramma's friend Alice. Chain-smoking dragon-voiced Gremlin of the Campgounds.

I've also never met a Derek/Derrek/Derrick that has been of any use. Always coworkers, always lazy, whiny, selfish people.

And then there's the name Kanye. Okay, nevermind, that one's just going to always suck forever.

The one that really does me in though is my mother's name. Thankfully, it's not very common but the few I've met haven't done much to improve my opinion. I still can't see it or hear it without having a bit of a physical reaction.

That's why I was especially annoyed to deal with a lady of that name all weekend on Craiglist. We went back and forth via email several times - did I have a closeup of the loveseats, could I tell her the measurements, did we have dogs? - before she agreed to come at 6pm last night. At 6:30 she emailed me - oops, she completely forgot, could she come at 7:15 after her daughter washed her car? Yeah, sure, whatever. By 7:30 she had emailed again that she wasn't coming but if we could hold the loveseats until next weekend, she'd like to come see them at that time.


Thanks but no thanks, Lady With the Lousy Name. I'm tired of these stupid loveseats and Goodwill can have them as soon as we can arrange a time for pick-up. I should've known from the start that anyone with that name would be a pain in the arse.

Are there names that you feel similarly about? I'm still rereading the Anne of Green Gables series and I can't find the exact quote but Anne talks a bit about living to beautify your name. I hope I'm not destroying Cate for people. All the fantastic Kanyes, Alices and Derricks in the world probably couldn't do enough to overcome the feelings I have about their names.

P.S. My apologies to any Kanyes, Alices and Derricks out there.
P.P.S. Actually, I'm probably pretty safe in saying screw the Kanyes because I think the numbers are in my favor there.


Ryan Ashley Scott said...

My real name is Kanye. I'm seriously offended.

Erica does it to me. It's a nice name, but there was this girl in school.... I sat behind her once in science class and it was the first and only time I've ever seen live lice *fingers crossed*. I'll never hear that name without shivering.

Agreed on the Derick - completely useless.

Princess Andy said...

i had actually wanted to use the name cate for one of my daughters.

too bad for me that there was someone else who had a vote.

although i'm assuming that cate is still not the name you were born with...



TMC said...

I've never met a Cody/Codeye/Codie that wasn't a db or frighteningly evangelistic.

mo.stoneskin said...

You need to sort out your email filters. In a few minutes from now you could be sorted for ever, all emails from people with names you don't like sent straight to the trash.


found you via pooba now following.

i don't like names that are androgynous like PAT or KELLY or TRACY

unfortunately, one of those is mine

soulbrush said...

um i really hate cutsey pie names, shite can't think of one right now...tee hee shows how much i hate them!

Hayley ♥ said...

"I've never met a Cody/Codeye/Codie that wasn't a db or frighteningly evangelistic."

Whoever spells their kid's name 'Codeye' needs to be taking to a mental ward - that's ridiculous.

Also, I hate the name Harold. It's just not cool. Reminds me of fat, smelly old men.

C. Beth said...

This is funny to me. Chickie is friends with a little girl named Alice who I like. Derek from my junior high and high school was adorable and sweet. But chances are, the names I don't like are ones you might have no problems with. Not crazy about the name "Jeremy." And I never did like my husband's name, but I think he's finally changed that for me. :)

And I'm also annoyed by some modern names...Katelyn (Caitlyn, Kaitlynn, etc.), Mackenzie, etc.

a corgi said...

were you giving the love seats away free? I can see someone pulling something like this; happened to me before giving away free things on Craigslist and people wouldn't show when they were suppose to


Lindy said...

I will always associate Kanye with IDIOT as I did before. It's funny how we can connect names with bad experiences or people. And I'm with you on the odd spellings of simple names.

Drahdrah said...

Haha, the google ad at the bottom of your screen was for an Alice in Wonderland costume !!!
I've been having similar problems with postings on craigslist. I'm trying to give stuff away and people are VERY specific about what they are willing to pick up FOR FREE !!!
Can't think of any names I really can't stand right now... I'm sure some will come to me (probably at 2AM).

Grand Pooba said...

I'm with "speaking from the crib" I hate people who name their little girls an androgynous name and use the BOY spelling.

Like KELLY for example. Or KELLY, who wants to be named KELLY!

Grand Pooba said...

Oh and there was this nerd I new from elementary to high school who's name was Patrick.

I will never ever ever name my child Patrick!

Rena said...

For me it's Kevin. UGH. Sorry, Kevins-of-the-world, but I think I can say if I met you I'd hate you. (All the people my mom knows named Kevin have also gone to jail.)

No, I love the name Cate/Kate/Catherine/Katherine/Katharine, but those are the only spellings. Stick a useless y or x in there and it's ruined.

(The only people who have my name sound like foreign nuns, old relative's friends. It's Renata.)

2cats said...



blognut said...

So. You mentioned Anne, but you didn't say if that was a good name or a bad name.

I need to know... because, as you know, it matters.

Mariana Soffer said...

I think one of the worst for english speakers is dick.

Janet L. Nowlin said...

Mariana that is so true!! There aren't too many names out there I absolutely hate, but what gets me are the great solid names like Michael--the name of probably 20% of the guys I went to school with--the name I would love to give a son, but only if I marry a guy with a stellar last name, because that's pretty much how he'll be called by all the other Michaels out there.