But if it truly takes the same amount of energy to love or be calm, why do I keep feeling the anger? Maybe I'm just that well-practiced.
It's like how they say "it takes x muscles to smile and x+y muscles to frown," arguing that smiling takes less energy or work. Except you know that whole thing is crapola because the numbers in the saying change with every version.
Plus, you know, the practice.
I'm late posting this morning because everything I think about to post is leaning towards angry or negative. So I'm just going to call myself out on it right here and get it out of my system.
I'm angry that:
- my foot is in a lot of pain for no reason I can determine
- my back has been bothering me now for several days
- I'm grossly overweight and hurting too much to go workout
- lately I've been losing things around the house
- I have much to do and little motivation
- I left out the best part of the story in yesterday's post
- gifts I sent the family for Christmas were barely acknowledged, nevermind receiving any thanks for them
- I can't do everything myself