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Thursday, February 04, 2010

First Fursday: Fighting For My Life

It's time for First Fursday and this month's edition is provided by Tonya.

Last Tuesday, I was watching my humans eat their rations when I noticed a strange feeling on the side of my mouth. I licked and tossed my head long enough that the long-haired one came over to take a look. As soon as she looked in my mouth, she started yelling and pinned me to the floor. Something about a tooth? Anyways, the short-haired human sorta plucked at my tooth and then I didn't feel bad anymore so I went upstairs for a nap.

I didn't sleep long though when the long-haired human came up and was all snuggling and crying and apologizing for being a bad kitty-owner. Whatever, woman, do you think you could at least make yourself useful and give me a tuna treat?

A few days went by with nothing out of the ordinary. No more of that whining and crying. Maybe she took a happy pill. Then one afternoon, I was napping on the bed when suddenly the short-haired human came in and swooped me off the bed. We were already in my cage and in the car before I even woke up enough to protest. Before long, we were at the doctor's office and my other human was there waiting for us.

Things started out well enough. Some yapping by the people, blah blah whatever. Then a stranger picked me up and carried me out a back door. My humans didn't even come with us! She placed me on a cold table and tried to hold me down while some other person came at me with a pointy owie thing!!! I'm not stupid, I remember those things and they HURT!

So I might've hissed a little. The wimpy chick let go and I managed to corner her at one end of the room while a third person came in grabbed me from behind. I hissed and tried to bite her but since I'm down a fang, it wasn't very effective.

Despite my best efforts, the three of them managed to somehow get a muzzle on me. Then the doctor came in and stabbed me with the owie thing. I screamed super loud. Like a mountain lion or a ferocious tiger! My humans said they heard me from three rooms away. Well, good for them. Because they didn't have to endure the horror of these strangers tying them down and stabbing them!

Finally the torture-techs let me go back in my cage and took me back to my humans. I wasn't real thrilled with anyone at that point but I figured I had a better chance with the humans than I would staying there.

Bet they're all glad they don't have to see me again for awhile! Ha! The last laugh is mine!

P.S. The last laugh isn't Tonya's. Assuming her bloodwork came back fine, she'll be going next week for a dental cleaning. Please don't tell her.


Missy said...

Leaving you an award on my blog today. :)

silver star said...

I'm sorry you had to put up with all those mean humans Tonya.

The Brown Recluse said...

Tonya! You put up a good fight...we are all so proud of you.
AKA The Mound of Round Hound

Nessa said...

Humans are dastardly. Give them H-e-double hockey sticks.

13 Characters from Rose and Prince Brendan

Autumn in jeans said...

Haha I love these :) Wish they were a weekly thing sometimes :)

Thanks Tonya for telling it like it really is :)

Margaret said...

Humans suck don't they. You and my kitty elinore would have a great time bashing humans!

Kathy said...

Oh Tonya, you need to talk to my kitty Bobs. On her last visit she attacked and bit the vet tech bad enough to send her to the doctor. Of course the vet got the last laugh when she locked poor Bobs away for 10 days and charged the human 285 dollars...

C. Beth said...

My lips are sealed!!