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Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Robotic Groundhogs

Due to my affinity for robot armadillos (remember the Great Robot Armadillo Incident of 2009?), this news story caught my attention.
PETA proposes robotic groundhog for Pa. festival
Yeah, PETA is standing up for the groundhog, claiming the crowds and noise and lights are indecent so the little rodent should be replaced with a robot.

Seriously? A robot. Wow. Like in Caddyshack I suppose (wait, sources tell me that's a gopher, nevermind).

I kinda love William Deeley's response. Mr. Deeley, by the way, is the president of the Inner Circle of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club. Isn't that the best title ever to put on your resume? Also, is there an Outer Circle as well?

Anyways, after describing the posh living conditions enjoyed by one Mr. Phil D. Groundhog, Mr. Deeley said "PETA isn't interested in Phil from Feb. 2 on, and is looking for publicity."

Exactly right, Mr. Deeley. I hate that crap. You really care about the Punxutawney Phil, you make a movie calling out his holiday that has almost nothing to do with him and then you cast the funny but un-hot Bill Murray as a romantic lead don't just freak out about it in time to have Google index some fresh news about you in time for the groundhog searches. You would care all year long.

PETA is one of those organizations that makes me crazy. I think at heart I share their cause. Who wouldn't be in favor of the humane treatment of animals? But when your organization is reduced to conveniently-timed publicity stunts, extreme measures and ridiculous causes (like robotic groundhogs), you lose some credibility.

Next thing you know they'll be coming after me, accusing me of punching Tonya in the face, causing her to lose a fang. Know who else only has one fang? This guy:

Now that I look closer, I see a really strong family resemblance.

Also, since I have your attention, Phil, let's see what we can do about Spring coming sooner rather than later, okay? I wouldn't want to have to serve you with a side of mashed potatoes punch you in the face. Because that would be a legitimate offense and I don't have time to deal with PETA.


mo.stoneskin said...

I would be in favour of the humane treatment of animals providing humane doesn't mean humane, because humans, to be honest, can't be trusted!

Grand Pooba said...

For real? That's so ridiculous it's funny. Bah! What's the point?

Tortuga said...

Haha, I love your outlook on PETA. I so agree. The idea of ethical treatment for animals is a noble and good one, but they just take it too dang far.

TMC said...

Yes, I agree. PETA does themselves more harm than good. I used to be a member and I still support some of what they do but no one can take them seriously anymore.

Also, I'd know if you punched Tonya in the face because you'd be missing an eye.

C. Beth said...

I'd be curious what groundhog tastes like.

Probably tastes like cat.

Princess Andy said...

i H.A.T.E. the movie "groundhog day".

i want all the people in it to die after the third "same day".


p.s. i love the cartoon.

Rabbit said...

I have it on good authority that groundhog is MUCH better with potatoes scalloped, rather than mashed.

Nessa said...


Poor Tuesday

Gail said...

Our provincial groundhog is a puppet and his name is Merv.

Gail said...

PS: And it predicts an early Spring. Not sure how a puppet can predict such things...I think it must be magic.

Jeanie said...

A robotic groundhog! I agree that PETA is good in theory, but they do their cause more harm than good with some of their foolishness.